April 26, 2011

PSA: you're not funny, you're mean.

Today's Public Service Announcement goes out to all the people that think they're funny when really, they're just mean. 

I had a hysterectomy.

When I was 26. 

And I do hormone replacement therapy, not because of the uterus thing, but because I have an autoimmune disease that freaked the hell out because of my pregnancies. 

So, every day, I take some little pills that make me feel like a regular person. 

What does a regular person feel like? 

Well, about 15 years ago when I used to be one, I remember that I didn't get headaches, I didn't throw up every day, and my feet weren't numb all the time.  

I didn't have hot flashes, my hair didn't fall out in droves, and I used to really enjoy summertime.

You can make fun of my schedule all you want, but if my dosage is off by as much as 20 minutes, I feel like I'm going to die. 

So yes, I throw up. Every day. And ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, it sounds like morning sickness!

And when you joke about how I must be pregnant, even though you know full well that that possibility slammed the door in my face when I was 26, I get offended. 

Because it's not funny, and you're not cute, and I would love to feel normal for just one freaking day. 

So thanks so much, and I just wanted to tell you that you're mean

And that is today's public service announcement.