February 13, 2014

Goal

:DRUMROLL:

I got accepted into the teaching college and I start March 1. I'm on my way to being an elementary school teacher, and I am PUMPED.

In other news, it's snowing, so school is cancelled. We stayed up late and watched Lord of the Rings in front of the fireplace. It was cozy. And I decided that I should have used Eowyn as a middle name for one of my girls. We discussed it a little while, and a few of my children volunteered to name their future children Eowyn. Of course, we also watched Ender's Game today, so Thaddeus volunteered to name someone Ender. (We like "E" names because I was an Ellsworth, so it's like paying homage to my awesome family.) Only poor little Daniel doesn't have an "E" for his middle initial because we liked the way Daniel McCune sounded. But McCune is still a family name on my side, and it's an AWESOME name to have. Plus, if you say it backwards is Enuccm, which would totally be the name used in the Lord of the Rings.

The kids brought home all sorts of sign ups for spring sports today too. The boys want to play football, and the girls want to do cheerleading. Blayne would prefer to do gymnastics, but I have to go see how much that costs. Bad thing about living in the boonies is that there's not a whole lot of options and variety in extracurricular venues. There is one dance studio, on gymnastics place, one karate center. And they charge a LOT of dollars, and we would go into "town" but then I have to pay for the gas to get there... basically it's going to cost a million dollars no matter what we do. But we haven't decided for sure one way or the other if people are going to do anything, but I told the girls, that THEY get dibs on activities first, and I'll budget for them, because just the boys are doing basketball right now. And we're all about the fairness of things around here. Also, Taylor points out that SHE has never done ANYTHING because, well, she hasn't. The other kids have done soccer, and now the boys are in basketball, and Taylor is a sad, pathetic child with no team sports to her name.

The plan for the snow day is to clean the house really good. I hurt my back really badly in high school, and I've had problems ever since. I actually pinched a nerve under my shoulder blade, and I can't lift my arm up very much, and I can't hold any weight on my left side. I mean, I CAN, but then I have fire radiating from my shoulder to my elbow and down through my back into my hip. I've lived with it for so long, that I don't really think it's that big of a deal, except that I can't do the laundry, or pick up around the house, or vacuum, or lift the pots out of the cupboard.... I manage, and I take half of a pain pill, and I figure it out. But since the kids will be home, I will take full advantage and boss them around until the house is no longer disgusting. I will even fold all the laundry. I just can't sort it, switch it, or put it away. But if they do all that, and bring the clean clothes to my bed, I can sit there and fold it without wanting to chop off my arms.

My back flare ups are usually not too bad, but since we're having crazy weather in addition to my back problem, it's pretty painful. I decided I need to get new bras that have closures in the front, because I literally cannot bend my arms to snap the back closures.

It's things like that, that remind me that I have major health problems. Ten years ago, I never would have thought, "Oh, I need to buy this kind of bra, because I have this kind of problem." We had to get risers for the bed, because it was too low, and I couldn't get out of it in the morning. I only wear certain types of shoes, because I can't tie laces when my hands don't work. It's all the little things that I live with, and adjust every day. I've gotten so used to them, and have learned to compensate, so I don't think of myself as a sick person, and then something completely and utterly stupid comes up, and I am not capable of doing a task, and I'm like, Oh yeah, I can't do things like that anymore.

I don't know how to explain it, and I don't want to sound like I'm complaining, because I'm NOT. I just don't think people realize how hard it is to live in a body that doesn't perform the way you want it to. I think most people take it for granted that they can get out of bed and walk to the bathroom, because I have days when I can't. And bless my sweet husband and kids who step up to the plate every single day without one complaint. They are so stinking amazing, and I am beyond lucky to have them in my life.

And on that overly emotional sentiment, I'm out.

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