August 15, 2011

A Horrible Conundrum

I don’t think knowing that I have arthritis in my neck has helped me any.

In fact, I would venture to say that is has completely ruined my life.

I know that sounds a little melodramatic, but you have to understand that BEFORE, when my neck was aching, I would take some pills, use some essential oils, and call it a day.

But now, AFTER I know what’s going on, my neck hurts all. the. time.

Like, HURT hurts all the time. It’s like I subconsciously gave myself permission to feel crappy, and my neck is rejoicing in the news.

Or it could be the weather.

But I prefer to think that my neck is doing it on purpose.

ALSO: I think it’s growing. Like, in the back, I can feel a HUNCH. It can’t be my imagination because I can FEEL IT…. GROWING… ALL HUNCHLIKE AND STUFF.

Of course, it’s growing from the UNDERNEATH where you can’t see it, because it’s sneaky like that.

And BEFORE, I would totally be able to convince myself that this is all in my head, but now, AFTER, I’m not so sure.

Because I can FEEL it. Therefore, it must be happening.

Essentially, I am coming to realize that my life has been turned into a horrible conundrum of devastating proportions.

For example: let’s talk about a headache. I get headaches every day. BEFORE, I chalked it up to many different things, mostly lack of caffeine and sleep.

But NOW, I am caffeine free, sleeping more, and I STILL HAVE A HEADACHE.

What, may I inquire, is the POINT of going to bed early and not drinking soda if I don’t magically feel better?


These are the questions that I ask myself…. as I sit here…. growing a hunch….
before and after